So, I've been back from my big Italian adventure for over a month now. Much has happened since my return to American soil, and much hasn't changed at all. I'm switching things up a little now-- this is now just going to be a regular old blog about the thoughts I have that I decide to type up and share.
The quick and dirty update on my current life: About to start my "Advanced Practicum" @ Wiley Elementary in West Richland. Working as a nanny right now. Single. Learning a lot about the multiple facets of grace: its cost and worthwhile blessings included.
Water.
I like to run my hands under warm water when I'm stressed. Something about it soothes me and calms my frenzied mind in a gentle way. My relationship with Jesus is the same way. I come to Him, my heart beating at a frantic pace as the imagined crisis at hand is seemingly taking over my life. And Christ looks deep into my eyes through this fractured heart of mine and quiets the turmoil within. I turn my tear filled eyes to the safest place I know; the feet of Jesus. The truth and the grace that I have so desperately been craving but never thought to ask for is shown and given.
And my life is centered once again on what it should have been centered on all along. Sometimes I look in the mirror when the warm water is running over my hands. Depending upon the day or situation I see something altogether different in the reflection looking back at me. A proud woman who is putting on a brave face. A little girl with big dreams. A sinner. A saint. Someone dangerous for the kingdom of Heaven. Someone who dances to pop hits from 2008. Me. Who I want to be. Someone I've always been. Princess. Prostitute. Loyal to a fault. Miserable because of my affections. Strong. Tired.
You name it, I've seen it staring back at me in the mirror. Who do all those reflections need?
They, I, need Jesus. So I turn the water to 'warm' and reflect on how Christ walked on water. The water from the rock. God parted the Red Sea. Noah built the ark and then the rains came. Jonah and that whale. Water to wine. Becoming fishers of men. The woman at the well. Something about water reminds me of Jesus. And my world is centered. My focus is shifted from me to Christ. Problems pale in comparison to the riches that are found in a life with Christ. I blink and in the mirror I see myself a little more like how God sees me. Beautiful. Redeemed. Worth it. Learning. His. Kaley Dawn.
